You think you've got it all sorted out and calculated and then one little thing comes along and un-thefuck-does it. Throws you completely off track. Changes your focus, your whole pace is thrown out of whack. Unwinds every fucking thread you've worked so hard to weave together.
But shit happens. Easy to say isn't it? Easy to say when some one else is dealing with it.
Something that kind of hits me here is the hardest part about being part of a team isn't risking your own neck, it's watching your team members risk theirs.
So you hurting isn't nearly as hard as watching some one hurt, who means something to you, no matter how little or how much, and not being able to do a goddamn thing about it.
Then the other frustrating part is: am I reacting as I normally would? Or am I different. Should I do it this way? Why isn't this way working? You start second guessing yourself, which doesn't help either. You want to do something but your not sure if it's the right thing and your scared it will ruin what your trying to do if it's not.
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
I'll work it out one day.
If any one has any tips,
Feel free to send them through.
Mr XL
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